Hey there, sorry for the knee troubles. Everything you are feeling is normal. Even if it does suck. Quite often after ACL and other types of repair the knee is never quite the same again. It can be brougt back to a competative level, but is difficult and lots of hard work. Sometimes with a meniscus tear you don't feel it. Usually though you do, but once it has been damaged it can tear again without all the fanfare. It is natual to worry about hurting the knee again. I think about it alot, but try not to let it dictate everything I do. Somethings just are what they are and can't do some things anymore.
As for the handicap card, am so jealous.
If you decide to go ahead with the meniscus surgery, remember that down the road you will probably get OA anyway. So it may be best to get rid of any flapping parts in the knee so you can do more things you like. I knew after surgery #2 and #3 that I would have OA young. Did not let that stop me, but did what I could to help the pain issues so I could play sports and stuff again.
Hope this at least cheered you up.