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Author Topic: Frustrated with people  (Read 4603 times)

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Offline bd1

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Frustrated with people
« on: November 02, 2010, 06:11:36 AM »
Hi,
Why is it that people just don't understand that a knee injury that happened 6 years ago can still be a problem after you had it fixed?
I bumped into a friend who i'd not seen for  4  years and the first comment was about me wearing a brace and I thought you'd had it fixed as though How can it be a problem after so long.
I've had quite a few comments made over the last few months since I started having problems with my lcl again
When People see i'm wearing a brace again and tell them I may need more surgery it's as if they think how can you still be having problems after so long,
Sometimes i'm wishing it on them so they may understand.
Sorry for the rant
1999 acl mcl recon'
05 knee dilocation acl mcl lcl pcl recon's 80% lateral meniscus removal
06 plc recon' lcl tighened up
Chronic lcl problems(ongoing)
reinjured dec10 mcl grade 2
hamstring tear

Offline k66yla

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #1 on: November 02, 2010, 07:19:47 AM »
I know exactly where you are coming from, my managers at work are the same.  ::)
April 83 - Right Knee Trauma
             2 Broken Wrists
1999    - Lateral Release Left Knee
Nov 10 - Anterior HornTear & Parameniscal Cyst Athroscopy Left Knee

Offline Silkncardcrafts

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #2 on: November 02, 2010, 11:52:29 AM »
Totally understand what you mean.

Even one of my nursing friends doesn't understand that I can get pain 9 months after my trochleoplasty in February. It is a very big operation and tend to heal slowly.

Don't worry what they think. They are just ignorant to it all.
11/1996 - RK LR
07/1997 - LK LR
11/1998 - LK MPFL Reco
12/2005 - RK LR Repair
07/2006 - LK MPFL Repair
11/2006 - LK LR Repair
22/05/08 - LK Trochleoplasty
11/02/10 - RK Trochleoplasty
07/03/11 - RK Chrondroplasty

Offline Clarkey

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  • Neil TheElephant knee packed up carrying his trunk
Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #3 on: November 02, 2010, 05:44:10 PM »
Hi There,

I also know what its like when people cannot understand why you have got a knee problem for so long and would just take it with a pinch of salt at what others say about your knee. You know what its like having a knee thats never right and is hard to accept other peoples negative comments.

When I had my knee injury after a fall in October 2007 people told me its all in my head but when they finally believed I had a problem with my right knee and did a scope found I had an inflammed plica and had my medial plica removed. Nearly one year post op and my knee worse then it was pre op and now my OS thinks my knee is ok even though I cannot run and hurts to kneel and squat.

Hope you get somewhere with your knee problems.

Nick :) {2010} :)

RK: PFPS, Arthrofibrosis, Tendinopathy, Five cortisone injections
16/01/18 Anterior interval release, distal patella excision, lateral meniscal repair
18/07/14 Anterior interval release  
16/11/09 Medial plica excision, fat pad trimming

Offline SuckyKneesInNC

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #4 on: November 02, 2010, 08:30:21 PM »
i know just how you feel... and in my case it is not just friends but my own husband just does not understand. He had knee surgery about 2 years ago because he did something stupid and got busted up doing it and he tells me to quit whining about my knees his knee hurts all the time to so I need to suck it up. The difference is that I have been dealing with almost constant pain in both my knees for 25 years now and while he sits down after work and relaxes and goes on the computer or watches TV I am cooking cleaning, walking the dogs, feeding the horses. running the kids around, all that other fun stuff.

Offline surrender

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #5 on: November 02, 2010, 09:47:03 PM »
That's why I love Knee Geeks so much!  They understand each other and never tire hearing about someone who is struggling.  I have come to realize no one can understand what it's like unless they lived it.  Each step is another struggle, new muscles compensating, new pain, and it gets very frustrating.  Wherever we go, there is our knee, eh?  I broke my patella almost 3 months ago.  As soon as I could stand again, my family assumed we were all back in business!  I still have the hardware and a ways to go just to bend my knee but I can stand and hobble so what else does one need?  I am thankful for that but whenever I get down, I get on Knee Geeks and know there are people who understand.

Offline coral 251

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #6 on: November 03, 2010, 09:12:53 PM »
Hi, i must say i agree entirely with all the comments,every-one on knee geeks are talking knees,we all know and understand what its like,but i do appreciate what others are thinking,before this injury i may have been just the same.
I feel my friends and family avoid asking me how i am any-more,scared to death i may mention the "dreaded knee".
So yes, knee geeks is great,you can winge about the pains and any new problems you may be experiencing,you can boast about a tiny bit of progress,without any-one thinking that you are a total idiot just because you bent your leg another 5 degs.
Had it not been for this site i think i would have cracked up be-fore now.
 So thank-you to every-one for just being there.
           regards.
                       coral
23/03/10 displaced patella fracture 3 pieces right leg
26/3/10 had op,2 pins & figure of 8 wiring
full cast ankle to thigh 7 weeks.
18/5/10 cast removed xray showing hairline crack
26/7/10 walking unaided,full rom
31/10/2010.6 months post-op check,bone not healed,harware cant be removed

Offline kscope09

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #7 on: November 03, 2010, 10:11:15 PM »
It's the same for me.  People just don't get it.  They don't udnerstand how when you ahve abad knee anything can start a flareup and that you ahve to be really careful.

This site has been a Godsend I can't believe I've been on here for just over a year.
Feb 08 Inurred right knee
18 months of physio, knee tracking but knee still painful
Aug 09 Scope - Small tear in acl, fragment found in postereo-lateral compartment, suprapatella and lateral plica and small defect in mfc.
May 10 Right knee feeling better but left knee causing trouble as a result o

Offline weirdknees

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #8 on: November 04, 2010, 12:05:04 AM »
I don't really think it matters what people think, just think about what's helping you.  Unless someone has a similar thing, it's difficult for others to understand or be sympathetic.  People who have disabilities have to deal with this sort of thing a lot more frequently, it's generally because people can be pretty ignorant.   
« Last Edit: November 04, 2010, 10:14:26 AM by weirdknees »
knee pain since very young
2008 - diagnosed with patella tilt
2010 - partial meniscectomy

Offline jt801

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #9 on: November 04, 2010, 03:25:01 AM »
It seems to me from my own experience and what i've seen in other people that while a knee may be improved after surgery, its rarely as good as it was before the injury. I expected my knee to be as good as new after my surgery and that's not how it has turned out. The problem is that it takes having to go through this process to make a person see that having surgery isn't a perfect fix-until we can swap out parts like a car, surgery isn't going to make it as if we never got hurt in my opinion. Yet, that's how the majority of people think it works.
12/99 left knee lateral release and plica removal
1/09 right knee chondroplasty and microfracture LFC

Offline bd1

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2010, 05:02:44 AM »
Thanks for all the replies, 90% of the time I don't care what people think, I think people are ignorant to what you go through on a daily basis even if your having a good knee day your still thinking about every step and looking for what can damage you, I think what people don't understand that you can be having knee flare ups and wearing a brace to good knee days (which are becoming less frequent). I'm waiting to see os about what's going on with my lcl.
Thanks for listening
1999 acl mcl recon'
05 knee dilocation acl mcl lcl pcl recon's 80% lateral meniscus removal
06 plc recon' lcl tighened up
Chronic lcl problems(ongoing)
reinjured dec10 mcl grade 2
hamstring tear

Offline dm

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  • I hate my knee!! :(
Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #11 on: November 05, 2010, 12:47:10 PM »
a fair number of people get lucky and have their surgery and are back to 'normal' and on with their lives. Then there's "us" who get the complications. People just don't "get" that the doctors do the best they can to patch us up, but the knee they worked on will never be 100% again, and may always have some degree of pain and limited functionality. What do you have to do, get a letter from the doctor to explain to them that the surgery was basically a repair job to give you best case functionality because of the severity of injury, and that it'll never be the same as if it had never been injured? That to get 80% function is really good?

It frosts my cookies to see people with handicap tag, who can walk, and walk fast and/or normally, and I cant get them to give me one, when I only want it to use when I'm having a bad day, not all the time? Most of the time, it'd be put up, but on those really bad days, when you really dread going to the store, it would be so helpful to have that tag, yet I can't get one.... makes no sense. Just being on ssi shouldn't make you eligible for a tag, since you can get ssi for mental issues, the physical handicap rules should be imposed, yet evidently you can qualify for a tag just by being on ssi. Dumb.
multiple arthroscopies 2/00,3/01,6/01,1/03, 12/07,10/10. chondromalacia, severe medial joint space narrowing following 3 partial menisectomies, chronic pain problems, kneecap problems, OCD lesion, failed mfx.

Offline coral 251

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #12 on: November 05, 2010, 01:03:58 PM »
Hi,that is my sentiment entirely,i applied for a disabled badge,whilst i was in a plaster cast and was told, there wasnt a temporay one, so i could  not have one, unless i was disabled for a period of 3 years,trying to explain to them that the Drs had said it could last up to 3 years,and may-be longer,was a total waste of time.
I was told i would need to get registered as disabled, and get letters from my OS, go for assessment etc.
Yet as you have stated,people have them who can walk better than us,it is so unfair,especially when they say to you,"its ONLY a broken leg",if only it were...........
23/03/10 displaced patella fracture 3 pieces right leg
26/3/10 had op,2 pins & figure of 8 wiring
full cast ankle to thigh 7 weeks.
18/5/10 cast removed xray showing hairline crack
26/7/10 walking unaided,full rom
31/10/2010.6 months post-op check,bone not healed,harware cant be removed

Offline coral 251

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #13 on: November 05, 2010, 01:49:52 PM »
Hi,that is my sentiment entirely,i applied for a disabled badge,whilst i was in a plaster cast and was told, they didn't issue a temporay one unless the injury was to last for a period of 3 years, so i could  not have one, trying to explain to them that the Drs had said it could last up to 3 years,and may-be longer,was a total waste of time.
I was told i would need to get registered as disabled, and get letters from my OS, go for assessment etc.
Yet as you have stated,some people who do have them,  can walk better than us,it is so unfair,especially when they say to you,"its ONLY a broken leg",if only it were...........
        coral
23/03/10 displaced patella fracture 3 pieces right leg
26/3/10 had op,2 pins & figure of 8 wiring
full cast ankle to thigh 7 weeks.
18/5/10 cast removed xray showing hairline crack
26/7/10 walking unaided,full rom
31/10/2010.6 months post-op check,bone not healed,harware cant be removed

Offline surrender

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Re: Frustrated with people
« Reply #14 on: November 05, 2010, 02:17:15 PM »
The other aspect of a knee injury, is that it takes at least twice the amount of time for me to perform tasks.  So, each day hours are added because it takes longer.  I used to move at the speed of light all the time and could accomplish so much in a day.  Now, the basics take so much longer.  We don't just park the car and "run in".  What took 2 minutes can take 10 minutes.  Going to the grocery taps me out because I'm trying to avoid people plowing me down, veering around me, and just getting around the store.  We just have a "new normal" and each day we learn to "work around it."  People don't want to hear about it and they think we are just whining again.  They cannot know, I didn't.  I have such compassion for people now who move slowly and have an injury.  I saw an elderly man walking through the grocery parking lot.  He had a knee brace on, a brace on his arm, shuffling along with his cane.  He obviously had taken a fall.  I asked if I could help him and saluted him.  I would never have had a "clue" unless it happened to me.  Thanks to all of you who care.















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