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Author Topic: Advice please, fairly urgent  (Read 4183 times)

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Offline Beda

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Re: Advice please, fairly urgent
« Reply #30 on: March 09, 2008, 04:49:11 PM »
Oh Dear, what  a terible situation your in. Under no circumstances must that boy go back to a job s a kitchen porter so soon. I am a fully trained chef, and know what it means to be a kitchen porter, and under no circumstances will he be able to stand on that leg for such long hours, and lifting such heavy things, not to speak of slippery wet greasy floors. My Injury to my knee was originanly done in a kitchen with a washing up machine spilling out greasy water onto the floor, causing slippery conditions, and woosh! there went I and I've never worked in a kitchen since, and that was in 1979. I have toatally had to give up my career as a kitchen chef, and had to re-train to something more sendentary. i have to wonder why his parents are reacting like this. Do they have an internet connecton in the house?? i doubt it otherwise it wouldnt have come to this, but you must beg them for the sake of saving their sons leg, to let him be off sick at least a month more, (and even thats not enough). I'm sure if he goes to the OS he will be able to get a sick note, its inhuman otherwise.
Hope everything will go ok and hope you dont literally ge into too much hot water!!
beda
'79 trauma v.knee
'81surgery patella lux.
'84 osteochondritis dissecans
'86 osteotomy
until now 16 knee surgerys ink. 6 failed tkr. pretty much exhausted all areas and types of surgical proceedures for knees
all TKR's loosened & failed
2008 wait for Final arthrodesis
constant pain

Offline Andouillette

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Re: Advice please, fairly urgent
« Reply #31 on: March 09, 2008, 07:53:53 PM »
Thank you Beda, that is just the sort of definitive reply I was hoping for. I just hope that the OS will come down on such stupid ideas like the proverbial ton of bricks. The parents just seem to want to pretend it is not happening at all. They keep sending him out for walks....up hills! I'll talk to my daughter about it more later, she's too upset right now. She so wanted to go to that appointment with him...

Offline Beda

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Re: Advice please, fairly urgent
« Reply #32 on: March 09, 2008, 08:32:42 PM »
Maybe i f your daughter cant go with him to his appointment, she could work out a written list beforehand together with him  of questions he should put to the OS. Then he can ask the OS without her being there, and his parents need never know? i dont know, but somehow he needs to get a medical cerificate so his parents dont send him to work. Is it the economical side of things, ie. are his parents dependent on his income?? One would think so since they seem to be so desparate to get him back to work, but if he gets a medical certificate, then hes entitled to sickness benefits, so that should cure any economic problems.
Beda
'79 trauma v.knee
'81surgery patella lux.
'84 osteochondritis dissecans
'86 osteotomy
until now 16 knee surgerys ink. 6 failed tkr. pretty much exhausted all areas and types of surgical proceedures for knees
all TKR's loosened & failed
2008 wait for Final arthrodesis
constant pain

Offline Andouillette

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Re: Advice please, fairly urgent
« Reply #33 on: March 09, 2008, 10:07:25 PM »
No, I don't think it is strictly economic, they are both salaried, I suspect they don't want to have to pay for him though. I also suspect they are the sort of parents who are far more interested in themselves than their offspring. I may be being unfair, I am so cross it is hard to remain objective! My daughter is going to try and get him to make a list but she's worried about bringing up stuff that involves things like his future career when she isn't actually physically with him. He is rather inclined to get VERY upset.... She will try though. Thanks again for your help.

Offline tanyap

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Re: Advice please, fairly urgent
« Reply #34 on: March 10, 2008, 01:31:13 PM »
Hi Andouillette,
I fully agree with Beda - there is no way this young man will be able to return to heavy kitchen porter work so soon. Im sure the meeting with the OS will confirm that. If your daughter is able to speak to him on the phone perhaps she can go through questions with him? Could you appeal to his parents better natures and explain that you have had some advice from a variety of people who understand knee problems and that the general feeling is that he must be allowed time to heal?
Its possible that his parents are taking a naive viewpoint and thinking that the more he is forced to do the better and while this may be helpful at a later point in rehab i dont think it is the right thing for now.
You could fax a list of questions over to his OS's secretary and just state on it 'questions for Mr. x's appointment' and not sign it? Its possible that the list would be handed to the OS but it may cause problems with his family if they dont want outside input.
On the bright side the OS is not going to entertain suggestions that might damage his surgery so at least he will (in all likelihood) state what can and cant be done and I would strongly suspect a return to work so soon will be off the list. Dont forget that OS's can be quite authorative and hopefully he wont entertain any rubbish.
Try not to worry, you cannot control the situation so best to use your energy on support - even if you dont agree with the parents behaviour.
xx
Tanya


1986 - recurrent dislocations of right patella began
1988 - Modified Hauser Procedure
1991 - dislocations started again
2005 to 2007 - 150 dislocations in 2 years - OUCH!!!
June 2007 - new OS, new physio
Oct 2007 - VMO woke up
Mar 2008 - big quads, still dislocating
Apr 2008 - next OS app

Offline Andouillette

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Re: Advice please, fairly urgent
« Reply #35 on: March 10, 2008, 04:25:56 PM »
That's really good advice Tanya, specially the last bit, thank you. I'm going to try and take a step back and just be there when/if needed. I hope you are right about the OS not entertaining a return to work too soon, that would solve that particular problem very easily!

Offline tanyap

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Re: Advice please, fairly urgent
« Reply #36 on: March 11, 2008, 09:28:16 AM »
Sometimes you just have to hand over the things you cant control and hope that God (or whatever higher power you believe in) will take care of business. At the end of the day although this young man has not reached the age of majority yet he IS 17 years old which is old enough to ask questions for himself, and although it may seem to you that his parents arent up to much they have managed to get him to this age and he has a job, has a girlfriend etc... so maybe they are doing something right!!!
The OS is the expert in the situation, everything else is just guess work from us here and you yourself seeing someone in pain. You will find out what happened at the appointment through your daughter and hopefully things will be a lot clearer and less stressful - sometimes not knowing is more stressful than knowing things.
xx


1986 - recurrent dislocations of right patella began
1988 - Modified Hauser Procedure
1991 - dislocations started again
2005 to 2007 - 150 dislocations in 2 years - OUCH!!!
June 2007 - new OS, new physio
Oct 2007 - VMO woke up
Mar 2008 - big quads, still dislocating
Apr 2008 - next OS app















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