The WAITING ROOM => Emotional/Spiritual help and encouragement => Topic started by: Jennie on May 09, 2003, 04:59:35 AM

Title: :(Worried
Post by: Jennie on May 09, 2003, 04:59:35 AM
Hey guys,

   I just wanted to write and ask you all if you could spare some encouragement I could greatly use it :-/ I am having my patellectomy in 6 days and I am very very very nervous and worried I guess I just need to hear that other people get this worried too. I have had 6 previous surgeries and I don't remember being this nervous and upset. I just really needed to get that off my chest and if anyone could spare their stories of pre surgery worry and fears that you had I would really appreciate it :) thank you so much for letting me get that off my chest.

Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: Iona_-Uk on May 09, 2003, 10:32:50 AM
Hi Jennie

I really hope the surgery does help things for you, you are very brave undertaking this sugery.
I hope it gives you some relief from your pain & that your recovery goes well too.
I'll keep you in my thoughts.

Best wishes & good luck
Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: Heather M. on May 09, 2003, 08:45:40 PM

You are so young to have such problems!  Maybe the reason you are so nervous is that you're having second thoughts?  There's no rush, if that's the case.  Take your time to make your peace with the fact that you are having surgery again, it may help you enter this with a better state of mind.  Maybe if you saw a few more doctors you would be more comfortable with your diagnosis and the recommendations?  When I was facing my fifth surgery (after swearing I'd never have surgery again) I saw 4 different doctors in a two month period.  Each had a different idea of how to tackle the problem, from doing nothing to a Maquet procedure to patellectomy to a scope to take out scar tissue.  I picked the doctor whose procedure I could best live with.  

In your case, patellectomy is a huge, irreversible step and you are right to be cautious--it's not somethine anyone would do lightly, nor would your doctor casually recommend it.  We are here to support you whatever you decide to do, so please keep us posted on your progress and how things go.

So you know, I did see one doctor who recommended a patellectomy for me if other routes failed.  I refused to consider it, but he told me that some of his happiest patients were ones who had had patellectomies.  It's all a matter of what you can live with--his patients were thrilled to have the pain gone, so they were okay living with the disabilities that came from having no kneecap. They seemed to be very comfortable with their decisions, so I hope that whatever you do you find the relief you are looking for.

Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: SL99 on May 10, 2003, 04:13:22 AM
Hi Jennie,

Sorry to hear about your surgery, it's understandable that you will feel nervous about it. I wish I had some great advice on how to relax and reduce the anxiety, but I'm afriad all I can offer is a big hug and a friendly ear if you want to talk.

I hope everything goes well with your operation and will be thinking of you. Good luck vibes coming your way Darl.

Love and hugs....Jo
Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: Lizzie - UK on May 10, 2003, 04:29:32 AM

I have now lost count on how many surgeries I have had.  Let me say that I have one booked in for 16 June and I'm worried too - it doesn't get any easier.  I suppose because we know what to expect.

I think it is healthy that you are worried about surgery - after all it is a major thing to have done.  If you weren't worried, I would be surprised.

The thing is that you have expressed your worries, should help you.  Keep calm and know that we will all be thinking of you and sending you positive vibes for a healthy and speedy recovery.

Sending you my love and big hugs
Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: Ross on May 10, 2003, 05:08:51 AM
Jennie, to have come to the point where a patellectomy is considered necessary suggests that there has been a fairly high level of discussion of options and the likely outcomes.  OSs for all their other shortcomings are pretty conservative types and I'm sure the surgery is not being entered into lightly by any of the players.

Only two kinds of people feel no trepidation in the face of danger, a little healthy fear of outcomes indicates that you don't fall directly into either group.  God bless you and grant you the healing you seek, I pray that this procedure will move you along the path to recovery.
Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: mabdegonian on May 10, 2003, 03:57:33 PM
Mr. Iupa wrote a wonderful management book called "Management through guilt, bribery, intimidation, and other uncensored tactics."  Each chapter of his book covered a different management technique.  At the time he published his book sensitivity training was really big and he wrote a chapter about sensitivity.  I am getting to the point... honest.... Anyway he gave this wonderful quote about sensitivity.  "You make things sensitive by pounding on them.  Bruise your arm bad enough and it will be so sore you will not get it near anything that can hurt it.."

After 6 surgeries your body and brain have a little idea of what is coming but can also extrapolate how bad it can be.  The worry is part of self preservation.  The anxiety is part of the unknown outcome until it is done.  Knowledge is the cure for the anxiety, just like satisfaction was the cure for the cats curiosity.

Hope, Hugs, and Happy thoughts
Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: Jennie on May 10, 2003, 05:24:22 PM
Thank you all so much for your wonderful advice ;) I have peace about my surgery now I prayed about it and realized I have done this so many times I am gonna be fine! The root of my worry stems from the fact that I know I am gonna wake up without a kneecap :-/ and am just scared about what it is gonna look like and how much pain I will be in. But this will probably be the last time I will post before my surgery b/c up until wednesday I have alot going on like mothers day, pre-op, ect. so please keep me in your thoughts and prayers and I will post later next week after the surgery :D

Love, Jennie
Title: Re:  :(Worried
Post by: enuff81020 on May 11, 2003, 04:17:34 AM
Hi there,

A patellectomy is one thing my doc considered for me for quite some time and then knowing that there would be a tkr in my future no matter what, ruled against it.  i was deeply disturbed by that idea as well--it is an enormous thing, but my doc told  me that it would have eliminated my pain ASAP.

I am getting kind of "used" to  surgeries as well--have had 10 in 31 months with 2 more scheduled in the next couple of months.  I find that I'm more matter of fact about them, but that as I get the IV's in and wait for  the OR, I'm getting a panicky feeling about anesthesia.  I can't  explain it and I know that it doesn't  make sense, but it is what I feel and do...

The point is we all have our own fears and they are all important and legitimate.   I find that putting things in writing helps me--i dolittle organizers of pros and cons or lists of questions or webs connecting things.   somehow the visual aid in thinking gets me over some hurdles.  If you haven't come to the conclusion that this is best for you, a pro/con list might be  perfect thing to do.  It will clarify your feelings, needs, fears, etc....It could establish your need for  more info--or whatever is on your mind.

It is too  late to second guess after the procedure--I'm glad that you are thinking this through and searching now.

Good luck on a good decision and some peace of mind--with lessened knee issues.   that is the best of all worlds!  Sylvia