fractured patella/ motorbike accident

On Oct.13th whilst taking my CBT motorbike test i came off on an oil spill into a ditch, fracturing my patella, ( surgeon later told me it had exploded! ). After being opperated on that night, having a plate, screws and wires put in place, i was put in full leg plaster. Spent 6 days in hospital and once i was able to shuffle with a zimmer frame i was allowed home, couldnt do crutches kept falling backwards.

5 weeks in plaster they then put me in a brace set at 30 degrees, telling me to now lift my leg and bend it at least three times a day, breaking through the pain! easier said than done, with no pain relief and no support from hospital.

7th week i saw my g.p who gave me pain killers and got me in touch with physio. Had my 1st session yesterday and i feel so much better, no one had explained my injury properly before and the results of this on my muscles etc, i was told to press my knee down to strenghten the thigh muscles and to only bend my knee as far as i could and they showed me how to take little baby steps with my frame, id forgotten how to walk! I have another physio session on monday and i cant wait, its great finally getting some support because the fear i have when im doing the exercises is massive.

When i left hospital the surgeon said he wasnt sure to what extent id get full mobility back and was really dismissive of all my worries, but ive found this site and it has helped sooo much, reading what others have been through and are still going through has helped me stay positive. The hardest things for me is the guilt i have because of my daughter, how stupid i was to put myself in the risky situstion, seeing her face when i was in hopsital and the fear she has thats somethings going to happen to me again. the things i miss the most ; having a shower/bath, putting my daughter to bed, bonfire night (missed it) walking through the autumn leaves, taking my puppy for a walk, driving and so many more but im still here and it could of been a lot worse!