So sore

[Helen]

Hi Guys

I tried to keep the positive thought flowing, but its hard just now. I hurt so much and Im so tired, I just feel like packing it in. Im getting a lot of pain in other joints again, my mouth hurts and I keep getting blurred vision. To add to that this stupid knee keeps buckling and hurts so much that I cant do my exercises.  I almost hope the graft has failed...weird I know, but at least it would be a reason for some of the pain. I need a pain management doctor, but my OS still hasnt referred me so Im still 'coping' with the RSD by myself.

Sorry for the rant folks, but I needed to get it all out.
Hope you are all feeling better tonight than I am.
H

[enuff81020]

Hi Helen,

I'm really sorry that you are feeling so badly--me too.  We have had over 36 hours of straight rain and I think it is part of my trouble.   this has went on for so long that I can't tell anything anymore.

I did find out last night at therapy that I have been an overachiever, doing my exercises too much.  that was news to me--I thought that the more that I did, the stronger my legs would be.   Apparently, there is a point of diminishing returns and my therapist told me to take some time off.  (Twost my are mo tnat--OK, that's enough!!!LOL)

I do think that if these docs could come up with a way to make this pain manageable, we would all be more willing to, well to try other things, agree to procedures that seem scary, and whatever.  The out of control pain is what screws things up.  I've told my doc that I, for one, would just like to not have surprises--knees locking and/or buckling, leaving me stranded in stupid places or letting me fall down.  

If I could be the magic knee fairy, I'd wave my wand and this would all go away.  That would be better than money!!!  Sylvia

[Rich_NYC]

Sorry you are having so much trouble Helen Hang in there and keep pushing for pain management. It's the only thing that keeps me going.  If I could get a decent nights sleep things would be sooooo much better At least we have this place to come to

[Leentje]

Hey Helen,

Sorry to hear you are having a bad time, but I know how you feel, 'cause i'm feeling the same. My knee did really good but the last week has been painfull and I can't walk without limping, my knee feels like it wants to give out so I have to be sure it is straight when it touches the ground. Stairs are really difficult, not painfull, but my knee feels so unstable, sore and stiff. I keep doing my exercices although it gets harder every day 'cause of the lack of improvement and the pain. On top of it all I go back to work 11/4 but I don't think I can get through a whole day working. But i desperately want to build up my social life again as I am tired, bored and depressed of sitting at home.

Hang in there Helen, We're here to support each other.

Helena

[Helen]

Hi everyone

Life doesnt seem so bleak tonight. I had a rotten week last week and after today, I suspect that this week is following suit. Still at least I HAVE a job, and 3 healthy kids and a loving partner and a home and LEGS!! Things could be sooo much worse when you really think about it. Its looking more and more like the graft has failed, but luckily he didnt graft the whole patella tendon, just half of it. I still have function but its weak and unreliable. Its the thought of more surgery that terrifies me.

I guess the way Im feeling now is sore and scared but grateful for what I have. Im starting to plan christmas now, so I have something to think about when I get down. I love xmas..its ace!!

Many thanks for the support guys. Hope you are all doing OK.
H

[enuff81020]

Hi!

Your attitude is so nice--it is hard to be that positive in this situation.

I'm now working on christmas too--since I will be having my surgery on Dec 16, everything that needs to be done has to be done by then.  I will start organizing this weekend after we can put Halloween to rest.

Prayers and hugs for being more comfortable!  Take care, Sylvia

[Helen]

Thanks Sylvia. You may be suprised to learn that I have suffered from mild depression on and off for about 5 years, since I had surgery on my thyroid gland. Im now on strong anti-d's to control the RSD and my whole outlook has changed. Weird huh! Things are finally turning around in other areas of my life too, so I have something to be positive about, despite 'the knee'.

You are going to have a busy few weeks getting christmas sorted before you go in. Someone told me today that its only 8 weeks off.....aaaargggg! I have 3 kids, so its an expensive affair. But still, the whole season excites me like a big kid. I love it all. Cant wait Yay! Sorry got a bit excited there  .

Hope you are doing OK.
H