lululocket's TTT, 8th March 2012

[lululocket]

13 weeks and 1 day

I agree on the roller coaster Lorikeet!

I've had rather a good week. We had a 4 day weekend thanks to the Jubilee, and a great party full of neighbours we had never met before. I was on my feet A LOT for two days, and definitely felt it towards the end.

Over the years I've had some really bad 'knee moments', where I've had to insist on sitting down for an hour or two no matter how inconvenient that was. Memorably, after helping cook a four course meal (with 4 options per course = 16 dishes) for 120 people, I was in charge of cleanup. I had helped cook in this big kitchen all day, and after other people went home I was the only person who knew where everything went, and really needed to be all over it. Unfortunately, after standing up all day my legs were completely falling apart, I had to sit on the chair in the middle of this packed, chaotic space at 11pm, instructing about 20 brilliant people on what to do with lots of pointing as I simply could. not. stand.

This is different though - after being on my feet a bit too much it hurts, and I'm tired, but for the very first time in my life I feel a glimmer of hope that my knee is not going to collapse and fall apart. It's just a bit bruised and unhappy. But it will hold firm! Amazing, simply amazing.

I had physio today and he's pleased. I've worked hard this week, especially on doing mini squats (can almost do a one-legged, not quite getting my good leg of the ground yet). I'm also doing well with chair squats. Most of the session is him doing soft tissue work, massaging the patella tendon, keeping the patella mobile, working on extension which is still sticky each week.  Just the fact I'm letting him poke around my knee like this is pretty amazing. When I first saw my OS, he said I had one of the strongest apprehension test reactions he'd ever seen. When he pushed the kneecap laterally, I not only was extremely unhappy, I had a raised heartbeat, shallow breathing, turned pink for a few minutes...he said I was most definitely reacting really deeply! Now, after two TTTs, I don't exactly love my knees, but I let Chris manipulate it today and push on things without being bothered for 90% of the treatment. Even a month ago that was quite an ask! I still dislike the extension, and have to concentrate really hard during treatment to avoid tensing up and preventing the extension, but I'll get there!

There is hope guys!

[lululocket]

14 weeks and 1 day

Whaaaat? 14....

So, this week has been okay. I'm not in much pain, at all really, and if I concentrate really hard I can walk without a limp. But, I'm getting slammed at work, so I've not been that focussed on my knee. It's been a bit crazy, all of my projects seem to be colliding and changing at the same time. PT has slipped a bit. I was in the office four days this week, and it's been a huge step up, especially as I leave the house at 9am and get home about 7.30, and two hours travelling is really tiring. I'm still spending a small fortune on taxis, but I don't think that switching to the tube is going to happen until I feel confident that in an emergency I could get out of a train safely.

Next week I'm off work, which means I just have to get through today, and then I can sleep. I wonder if the bone has fused since my xray two weeks ago?

Lulu

[lululocket]

14 weeks and 3 days

I'm still going to PT every week, and rather than just giving me exercises that change each week, Chris is doing lots of work on flexibility within the knee, which is not something I had with the previous knee. He had a name for it, I forget exactly, assisted something, but it involves flexing the bones a little against each other, and some massage of the patellofemoral ligament. I have at times been a little alarmed by his intention to make the ligament flexible, as in my head the intention of the TTT was to lower my kneecap, and I thought that adding flexibility to the ligament would make the kneecap looser (and therefore higher again). Chris has done a good job explaining to me that having flexibility in the tendon is important as otherwise it prevents proper function of the knee, but I still haven't totally understood it properly in my gut. I'd love anybody else's experience of this!

Unfortunately, this Friday's session seems to have left the knee rather sore, especially when I'm leaving it bent, so when I woke up this morning it was quite sore, and I'm back on paracetemol. I'm hopeful that things are changing though.

I'm on holiday this week, staying with my grandparents. I'm really looking forward to spending some time with them and getting lots of rest. I'll keep doing my PT, but other than that I'm having a gentle few days. Unfortunately with the stress of work, and the attack on my body of having surgery, my overall health is not great right now. I am tired, have a sore throat, bad digestion, feel sluggish generally. I need to make the next month a time to really focus on my health.

Rest first. At the end of this week I'm going away with my church, which will no doubt be refreshing spiritually and get me in a better mindset for thanking God for my body and healing well. Then in a week or two I'm leaving my parents' house to move back home, and will regain control of my food so can focus on really solid nutrition. And then after I'm feeling stronger, exercise! Then the Olympic Games. Watching not competing I think, haha!

Small steps. Any ideas?

[Lorikeet]

Have a lovely, restful holiday, Lulu. And I hope the knee is much better by now (or soon will be).

Look after yourself.

[Fogie]

I hope your knee feels better soon & I hope you have a great time & rest well while on holiday. Take care !

[lululocket]

4 and ~3/4 months

Well, it's been a while. And to be honest, that's because things have been going quite well! It is a reminder to me that many of the people on this site are the ones who are having a tough time, when things go less well than expected, or are hard, and you need a little support.

In the 6 or so weeks since I last posted, I have come on huge amounts.

I had a week long holiday with my grandparents (grandma sadly can't walk very far, but her disabled sticker and walking pace was ideal for me). It was brilliant, just what I needed. Immediately after that, I moved out of my parents' home back to my normal home. For those planning, I could have probably coped on my own a little earlier than the 3 month mark, but it meant more time to focus on sleep and PT with my family taking such good care of me and not having to worry about cooking and laundry!

Home is great. Especially psychologically. I returned to working in the office every day, although commuting late turned out to be just as busy as peak times so I switched to being on the 6.52 train every morning, in the office by 7.35 and leaving again at 4.30. That was tough because it's hard to get to sleep early when the rest of the world is awake (and loud). I had maybe 2 weeks of taking a train and a cab (pricey), and then switched to the train and the tube. There are lots of stairs on London Underground! It wasn't fun really. But after about two weeks I switched from a crutch to an amazing cane I found which folds up into my handbag. I kept it longer than I really needed in order to ward other people off really (London can be pretty unforgiving to those of us who are slower paced). I ditched it about 2 and a half weeks ago, so just after the 4 month mark.

About the 4 month mark, there was also a massive shift from feeling 'unwell but a bit better', to suddenly feeling like 'a healthy person whose knee is still a little unwell'. I'm not really sure what really triggered the shift, but I'm starting to be so much more confident. I still have pain, and going down stairs properly is a challenge. Yesterday though, I was out with my family and my brother said I was walking along and in the crowd he was behind me, so I turned around and took three steps backwards to keep talking to him, before pivoting and walking forwards again. I didn't even notice! I'm sure some of you here realise what a big deal it is to walk backwards and not even notice! Given I had a cane that I was actually leaning on just a month ago!

Also, just before the 4 month mark, a huge brain FOG that I'd been struggling with started to lift. Occupational health at work noticed a huge difference, and I stopped feeling tired all of the time. 

The Olympics are also in town (where have you been?) and
a) London is awesome (Horse guard's parade! Hampton Court Palace!)
b) I am so inspired by other people doing sport!
I've got a turbo trainer set up in front of the TV and have sport on REALLY LOUDLY over the noise of me cycling. I'm also doing lunges, chair squats, normal squats, balancing on one leg, and even a bit of a one-legged squat. To me, that's unbelievable.

To give you an idea of why that's unbelievable, my left leg had the same Op 2 years ago, and EIGHTEEN months after the TTT I told my old physio that I wanted to do a one legged squat on my left leg before I had the TTT on the right leg, so that I was 'strong enough to cope with a leg out of action' (my words). He reckoned it was impossible (I don't know if he was right but it didn't happen anyway...). So to be doing a one legged squat less than 5 months out of a TTT, even if I don't get low enough to do a standard flight of stairs quite yet, is simply unbelievable to me. Most people get there, but I am SLOW.

I'm also starting to realise that sports may now become part of my life. I've never really done any sport. The odd things I did were always individual activities instead of team sports because I would have bad knee days and drop out, which prevents teamwork really. But today my housemate was talking about rock climbing and I thought, 'wait a minute, maybe after a bit longer I could actually try that'.

Don't get me wrong, there is a long way to go. I am still having PT, although it just went down to every 2 weeks. Obviously I can't spend my whole life hopping the end bit of each stair, and my glutes are still uneven and twisting to give me some lower back pain. My hip bone still feels a bit weak and raw on one side, and I have work to do on my quads still. And I have very nearly got full ROM (can get heel to my bum now!), but only after a bit of a warm up. I would like to be able to sit on my haunches, and that is a way off still (I tested it...had to throw myself sideways to get out of it!). I can't run even a few steps for a bus because the knee is sensitive and my muscles are slow and uncoordinated. And when I'm standing on a train, I really have to concentrate to stay upright. But I will fight. And I think I might just get there. Keep going folks!

[Lorikeet]

It's wonderful to hear such a great progress report, Lulu. I have also noticed a lot more progress in the past couple of weeks and I'm just a few behind you..although I can't recall exactly how long now.  I'm sure you will finally have success with the stairs...although I must admit it makes me feel better that I'm not the only one struggling there. I can't imagine doing a one legged squat at this point. I think I might come crashing down...although to be fair, I haven't actually fallen down once since surgery so maybe that wouldn't happen. Hopefully you'll be feeling as good as new in the next couple of months and good luck on any sporting adventures you attempt in the future.

We've been watching the Olympics on tv in the afternoon and evening but have to miss all the night time events due to it being middle of the night here. But I must admit I am not spending that time on any valuable exercise. Perhaps you have inspired me to at least pull out the exercise bike once in a while.